“We’re all afraid of the thing that already happened.” says Elizabeth Gilbert Author of Eat, Pray, Love.
 
That time a teacher or parent said THAT THING that wounds to the core of who we are. A creative wound.
 
That THING that imprints our young bodies and creates a shut down for sometime decades or maybe forever.
 
We’re afraid of it happening again. The thing that already happened.
 
How many people have I had in my classes with this wound, this silent killer of creativity?
 
I don’t know what compels grade school music teachers to shame innocent children into ‘standing at the back‘, or to ‘mouth the words,‘ but it happens all the time.
 
A couple of weeks ago a woman of about 65 told me she still carries those words with her that her teacher said about her singing voice.
 
She also shared that it has stopped her from singing her whole life.
 
Those statements that locked time into a small room along with their voice and carefulness crept up around them to replace freedom.
 
Breathe life into that silence. Say it out loud in a safe space. 
 
How many haven’t uttered or wrote a word, painted a painting, sang a song, danced a dance because of THAT THING someone said?
 
Someone said to me the other day ‘you have to get a thick skin‘, and I have been thinking about that and wondering, hmm, what’s another way? And do I?
 
Getting a thicker skin doesn’t make for good art.
 
Getting a thicker skin puts guards and walls around the very thing that creates and makes magic.  
 
And it certainly doesn’t help the singing voice.
 
The answer is not black and white. The answer is somewhere in the middle where choice lives.
 
Free speech is alive and well in the online world and giving everyone a voice, even if it’s a nasty one.
 
I recently heard Brene Brown speak to this topic about ‘being ready to put yourself out there‘ for others to scrutinize and her advice was to not put anything out there for the public to see or hear until you are ready and have worked through what you are writing or talking about.
 
Brene says her litmus test of when she knows she is ready is when she knows that; “my healing is not contingent on your opinion of those stories.
 
I would say I have one foot in each world.
 
The world of others opinions, and, the world of owning my truth and my voice.
 
Here’s to having both feet in the latter world!
 
I’d rather feel and have a creative skin, not a thicker one, so I must take care of my skin and know when I am ready, or, the above could happen to me, which it still does.
 
That being said you’ll certainly know where you’re at in your growth when someone has an opinion about your work and if your ‘owning it or not.
 
This is my work to stand by my words, sing my songs and write my writings even when the world say don’t.
 
I’m developing the sea legs to do this.  
 
What is the lesser of the two evils?
 
Having a voice and getting attacked, criticized and trolled? Or, not having a voice and being silent, keeping the silent killer firmly in place.
 
I think that’s an easy one. I choose my voice and I will build a skin that shakes off nasty like a deer in the wild shakes off pain.
 
But that skin takes time, love and my nurturing to build, and then just watch it shake. 
 
And if I can’t I’ll shrug, feel the ouch, and try again.

Reclaiming Our Natural Power

‘At first we must distinguish and then we unite’ - Goethe Singing requires us to separate the body parts to identify what the role is for each part. For example the throat, solar plexus, the rib cage and belly.  What does each part do? How does it assist the voice to...

Overcoming Stage Fright

Overcoming Stage Fright

The walk to the stage… So you’ve worked really hard on your art whether that’s singing, dancing, acting or speaking.   You’ve spent years developing, practicing and honing your talent and you want to share it with your audience.  You’ve developed your voice and you...

Dropping in…

Dropping in…

Take a few minutes right now to drop into your inner resources and activate your energy. "In this moment right now this love comes to rest in me." Rumi  Root - Legs, feet, base of spine Visualize red roots going downward into the earth connecting you into safety of...

Exercising My Will – The developmental stages of the will centre.

Exercising My Will – The developmental stages of the will centre.

Can you exercise your will and state your side in an argument?  Do you even know what your side is? I like to look at situations, and especially heated discussions, from ‘above the battlefield’ in order to try to understand both sides of the equation. This can...

The Ears act like Batteries for the Brain

Did you know that the ear is a battery for the brain? (Alfred Tomatis)  And that training your ear through voice exercises can do many things including: Energize and stimulate your brain and body. Increases neuroplasticity (what!). Improves balance and posture of the...

Authenticity in Singing

Authenticity in Singing

Authenticity   There comes a time in everyone’s life, hopefully, when what we have been trying to fix, perfect and improve in our own warped way has to be accepted, completely.   There is an inner longing that grows stronger inside of us that has a need for...

Do you have a hard time connecting to your feelings?

Do you have a hard time connecting to your feelings?

Try this 5-day challenge to drop into your belly and feel.... Connect to your belly… YOUR CORE, YOUR CENTRE, YOUR GUT INSTINCT, FEELINGS, EMOTIONS, INTIMACY. And...Where your Shadow lies - everything you don't want to see about yourself Get comfortable with your feet...

The Unbearable Weight of Creativity

The Unbearable Weight of Creativity

In the musical Les Miserables about the French Revolution there is a scene where the young soldier Marius is left sitting at an empty table with empty chairs where his friends used to sit. He sings, ‘there’s a grief that can’t be spoken, there’s a pain goes on and on,...

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